Carly Jenner is a leadership and confidence coach empowering high-achieving professional women to conquer self-doubt and perfectionism.
She is an Executive Leader, Board and CEO Advisor, Women’s Executive and Life Coach. Her passion lies in helping talented women like you raise and reach your full potential. She has been in your shoes, feeling the weight of fear, doubt, and pressure.
She is the founder of CoachingByCarly, visit her website HERE.
Whether you’re leading a team, a department, or a company, leadership always comes with a learning curve and, this curve usually comes on the spot and with little notice.
Tactics to know exactly what to do in a situation are invaluable, when we zoom out and follow some core guiding principles, we can steady ourselves no matter the heat of a moment.
Over the last nearly twenty years (frightening!), I’ve worked with leaders at all levels and these are five of the most common (and costly) mistakes I see when it comes to leading people:
First (and foremost): Not Seeing People Leadership as a Core Responsibility
Leading people isn’t something you squeeze in between the “real work.” Leadership is the real work. When someone reports to you, you’re not just managing tasks, you’re shaping careers. That’s not a burden, it’s a privilege. But it demands time, attention, and presence.
The reality is that a strategy doesn’t deliver results… people do. And without excellent execution, even the best ideas go nowhere. The data supports this, with weak leadership costing companies up to $550 billion annually in lost productivity (source Gallup.) It all starts with how you create clarity, coach, and communicate.
And a bit of advice, your seniors leaders and/or senior peers are already scanning you and your performance to judge if you know this. Turn it on now.
Second, Avoiding the Tough Conversations
Tough conversations are uncomfortable. They force us to override our instinct to be liked, to lean into conflict, and to make time for things we’d rather avoid.
But avoiding feedback erodes trust. High performers start questioning standards. Struggling employees don’t get the clarity or coaching they need. And small issues? They escalate.
The truth is your value as a leader is no longer measured by your individual output, it’s determined by the performance you can unlock in others. You can not unlock high performance without having direct coaching conversations.
The good news? Done right – with kindness and clarity – it will get easier and you’ll gain a reputation for being confident and consistent. Who doesn’t want a person with those qualities on their leadership bench?
Third, Prioritising Speed Over Quality in Hiring
Hiring isn’t just filling a seat, it’s shaping your team’s future and success or failure. And when leaders rush or rely on gut feeling (“I’d like to work with them, they seem nice” or “I could see myself going for drinks with them”), they often end up with the wrong fit.
A bad hire is more than a people problem, it’s a business risk. One of the key elements of business success, high performance and execution is having the right people, in the right roles. Hiring needs to be given the critical thought and dedication it deserves.
So, yes, they’re a personality fit which is a plus. And they can help you meet that urgent deadline. But what else must be in place unique to your KPI’s, execution needs and cultural specifics?
Fourth, Outsourcing People Issues to HR
“HR made me put you on a PIP”… “HR declined your promotion”… “HR says we can’t pay you more”.
It’s tempting to hand off the tough stuff to HR – performance problems, team conflict, engagement gaps. But your team doesn’t report to HR, they report to you. While HR is a critical partner, for coaching, support, and development. People leadership can’t be outsourced. Every time you do, you erode your credibility.
Instead, try being radically honest with yourself and take responsibility, embrace your leadership and positional influence.
Fifth, Mistaking Policies for People Strategy
A handbook isn’t a culture. And policies aren’t leadership. Some leaders feel covered by rules and documentation but compliance is just the floor. The ceiling? That’s what you create through how you lead day to day. You can have perfect paperwork and still have a disengaged, underperforming team. The truth is that you don’t need to be a perfect leader. But you do need to be intentional. The strongest leaders I’ve worked with aren’t the ones with all the answers, they’re the ones who ask for help early, invest in their people consistently, and treat every misstep as a learning opportunity. That’s what builds real leadership capacity, lasting credibility and teams that deliver the best business results.
Which of these five are showing up for you right now? Start there.
